Kia Ora bloggers welcome back to my blog,
As you know we are currently in lockdown, and we have had to use Google Meet to talk to our teachers and get our tasks for the day.
Yesterday we started off our lesson with our teacher showing us a picture and, we had to write a story about it. This is my story:
How do you like it? I think it was one of my best pieces of writing.
Ka Kite see you next time! :)
To Izzy
ReplyDeletewow this is amazing maybe next time add some exclamation point great job though. From Caitlin
Hey Iz, I am so glad you are proud of your writing. My favourite part is how you got pushed in the train my the human current and staring mindlessly out of the window. This is a great use of vocabulary.
ReplyDeletePerhaps you could explain why it was all colourful. Also, it was a bit hard to read in the slide format, could you perhaps copy and paste it straight into the blog, it may make it easier to read. I could show you how.
Keep up the great writing chick. Mum x
Hi Izzy,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your writing, I was very impressed when I read it yesterday. You have a great way of drawing the reader in at the start of your piece - it makes you want to keep reading! I really like your use of imagery - using words to make a picture in your head, I am sure when you are writing you can probably 'see' the scene in your head too. I mentioned yesterday that my favourite line was 'pushed to the 4th carriage by the human current', what is your favourite bit?
Thanks for going through and highlighting all your language features, that must of taken ages!
Perhaps next time you could put your writing on a slide so it is a bit easier to read, documents are hard to get right on our blogs. Oh and also double check your spelling in your title before sending :-)
Love your work!
Miss Roberts
Hey Fizz,
ReplyDeleteThat was a really cool little story, great work! I especially loved the way your words painted a picture in my head of exactly what was going on and how it felt.
I’m curious, how did you come up with the story? Why Japan? And how did you know what a Japanese house is called?
The magic tunnel is such a great way to interpret that picture, great work x
Dad
Hey Dad,
DeleteI don't really know how I came up with it, I think that when I saw the picture it just popped into mmy head. Japan was the first place that I thought of and I liked it and, it kind of went with the story. I googled what Japenese houses are called. :)
Love you,
Izzy ^_^